Sunday, August 19, 2012

Being a Mother

Being a mother is full of ups and downs I have come to notice. Even though I have only had the Mom experience for only over 3 weeks, I can tell ya about so many things I have felt and experienced in that short time, the good and the bad:)

Breastfeeding: So it appears for me that breastfeeding is wayy harder than I thought. It always seemed like the most natural thing in the world and to be perfectly honest I never knew why people didnt do it. I mean its free, and better for you baby and helps you burn extra calories... so where is the down side? That was my thought process before trying it. After trying it, and continuing to do it, I completely understand why people do not do it.
I am taking it week by week at this point. It's easier now than it was at the beggining, but it's just so tiring. Being the only one that can feed the baby, and constantly worrying about if your boobs are gonna leak, or the get really hard and full and painful I might add. Not to mention, Max doesnt always like to eat from them and still prefers the bottle most of the time. Going back to the tiring part, It takes at least 30 minutes just for him to eat, then there is the burping and the trying to get him to go back to sleep. In the middle of the night, this is over an hour process and he only sleeps for about an hour...so yes very tiring. Plus, I am worrying about what I am eating and if it is making him gassy. I don't know which foods upset him, but I know something must becuase somedays he is extremely more fussy than others. As I said, all very frustrating. One day at a time, and I am determined to keep going at least a little longer becuase I just bought some new cute nursing bras and am hoping they weren't a waste of money:) So, thats whats going on with that. I have a support group here for breastfeeding that are very helpful, so I haven't lost hope yet:) To make matters more confusing, Max isn't sleeping very much (maybe 7 hours total in 24 hours) and have been doing some research that suggests formula babies sleep better. ( because they aren't effected from the daily changes in a mothers breast milk) I am limiting myself to 1 or 2 caffeinated beverages a day, because I honestly can't get through a day without them with an average of 3-4 hours of sleep each night. Sigh, everything is so confusing, I want what's best for my son but is it worth all the pain, stress, tears, and frustration? I'm not sure at this point. I don't want to feel like a failure if I decide to quit because I know so women have done it. And that's what we are made to do; it's just annoying!

So besides all the struggles and things I have had to learn and go through, I can't help but love my little son so much! And I can honestly say he is the cutest baby ever!


Friday, August 10, 2012

All about Maximus

What I've learned about my son...
Its been a little over a week since I have had the privilege of having my little son Maximus and it's amazing how much he has taught me and I now know about him:)

1. He hates having his diaper changed, and taking a bath.
2. He makes the cutest faces and smiles after he finishes eating and is about to fall asleep.
3. He gets super squirmy if he needs to burp.
4. He likes to look around and is super curious, has really good eye and head movement.
5. He does not like to be swaddled anymore, because he likes to have his hands free.
6. He likes being in the car seat.
7. He constantly pees all over everything, we can barely keep enough clothes and blankets clean.
8. He was stubborn about breastfeeding at first, but now has gotten the hang of it (thanks to some ever amazing nipple shields)!
9. He will take a bottle too, so that makes it nice for me when I want to sleep and someone else can feed him:)
10. His hair is turning from brown to blond.

Friday, August 3, 2012

The Arrival of Baby Max...the birth story

How it happened, the birth of my son Max.
 I went to the doctor on Monday July 30th for my usual weekly appointment. It was at 10 in the morning. At the appointment, my blood pressure was really high and concerned my doctors. I have had sort of high blood pressure through out the pregnancy. But this time it was extremely elevated! The doctors decided to do a fetal stress test of the baby and some lab work to make sure everything was ok. Baby heart rate tested ok, but the amniotic fluid seemed to be a little low. The amniotic fluid level, my blood pressure and the fact that my blood platelet count seemed to have dropped recently, suggested to the doctor that I should deliver sooner rather than later. Being nearly 39 weeks, the doctors thought the best things was to get baby out just to be safe rather than sorry. We scheduled the induction for 2pm that same day.
I called Jeff and he came up to the hospital, we we were able to go home for a few hours before coming back to the hospital at 2pm. Once there, the labor and delivery ward was packed so they told us to go back home and they would call us once they could get us in. So we went home, called family members, tried to get some things in place at the house, took a shower and waited for the call. Jeff took a shower while I tried to busy myself by taking a walk around the neighborhood. The call came and we headed into the hospital around 7pm.  When we got there, we checked in and got settled into the room. To start the induction the doctor inserted follie balloons. They are balloons that help you dilate and once you do, the balloons fall out. I know it sounds gross and weird and it totally was haha. After they did that, the contractions started coming. Boy they were strong and super painful. I was expecting them to start slowly and grow in strength, but no luck as the balloons make you dilate, i was also having bad cramping constantly on top of the contractions! The pain was bad and they were able to give me some meds for the pain. The medicine kicked in, after about 2 hours of pain. Around 11pm I was feeling better, and only feeling the contractions, and not the cramping. Sometime in the middle of the night, maybe 2am-ish, the balloons fell out and I immediately started feeling better. The contractions stopped and I was able to sleep through the night, well at least a few hours until the started the pitocin (drug to induce labor) at 5am.
Contractions started again, slow and not so painful at all. Around 11am contractions still weren't terrible, but I thought it was a good time to get my epidural and I was dilated to a 5. Still in good spirits and my Mom got to the hospital around 12. After a little visit she and Jeffrey went to over to the BX to get some lunch. During the time they were gone, the doc came and checked me and  I was dilated to a 9 and would be pushing soon. I called Jeffrey and said they shouldn't take too much time being gone. Once they got back, it was 30 mins and I was ready to start pushing. Since I had the epidural, the beginning pushes weren't bad at all and I though "hey this is going to be easy". After a while, things started to get more intense, as Max started to get closer, the pain got terrible. I am not sure if the epidural had worn off or what, put I definitely felt everything! This was by far the worst part of labor! My mom, a nurse, the doc and Jeffrey were all there encourage me. Jeffrey was so compassionate the entire time. I pushed intensely for about 1 1.2 hours. I really thought I couldn't do it at the end, and everyone  kept telling me to go on, it was pretty rough and I cried at one point, it was pretty over whelming and painful. Finally, Max arrived into the world at 4:21pm and it was so crazy. I remember him being out and everyone kinda cheering. They put him on my belly, I thought I would cry, but all i could think was " the pain is gone and omg there is a baby here" it was so sareal! Jeffrey cut the cord and they took Max to the other part of the room to clean him up. There was so much going on at this point. Jeffrey was smiling and hugging me, telling what a great job I did. The nurses were cleaning and checking on Max, my Mom, was over with Max taking pictures, the doctor was still checking me out and delivering the placenta. It was such a crazy experience!
After a while, Jeffrey went over to take some pics of Max, the doc finished with me (no tearing btw, in case anyone wanted to know) and then they gave Max back to me. He was so cute, I couldn't believe it! Me and Jeffrey just kinda stared at him for a while:) We took turns holding him. He was perfect!
After a while, the room was cleaned up, and I was directed to go "clean up" in the bathroom. Because I had the epidural I wants allowed to take a shower until later that night, so I felt pretty gross. Can't remember too much about the rest of that day. I tried to nurse Max a few times, but didn't have much luck. At some point that night, Jeffrey took my mom to our house to sleep and then he came back to the hospital to spend the night with me. We didn't sleep hardly at all, as nurses came in every hour to check me and Max's vitals. And for some reason they didnt come in to give him his bath until midnight. The next day was pretty much just trying to feed Max and getting to know him. Because of Hospital policy we had to stay one more night. This night was hectic and the nurse took Max for a few hours so Jeffrey and I could sleep a little. That was nice. Still having trouble nursing as the little guy wouldn't suck. He latched just fine, but for some reason doesn't suck...
Yesterday morning we were all set to go home and get discharged when there was as problem with our car seat (which we rented from the hospital for our British car) the straps wouldn't properly fit Max because he was so little so they wouldn't let us leave. They wouldn't even let us walk him home. So we had a stressful hour or so when we tried to call the multiple thrift stores/afrc and other locations on base if they had a UK spec car seat we could borrow for a week until our car came in. It was all very frustrating, but finally Jeffrey located one at the thrift shop at Mildenhall. So he left to go pick it up while me and Max waited at the hospital still. I kinda worked out because I ran into a lactation consultant and she got me a free electric breast pump, and actually Jeffrey ended up getting the car seat for free too. We finally got home yesterday evening!
Last night was a little different. My mom and Jeffrey made me go to sleep at 6 because truth me told I had maybe slept 3 hours total in the past 2 days. But to be honest I really didnt feel all that tired. Any way, I slept for a few hours, got up to feed Max and then was ordered back to bed by Jeffrey and Mom. I was kinda hard to sleep since there was so much I wanted to do! Managed to get a few hours in and at 3am Jeffrey handed over Max to me to feed and for him to sleep. The rest of the morning, I fed Max, slept a little while he did and thats pretty much it. I actually feel really good and not tired at all. Once I am awake it's not so bad at all. Today Max had an appointment with Pediatrics. He gained some weight since his discharge and was all in all really good!
Everything is going well here, well except breast feeding is a little more difficult than I thought, as Max still won't suck. I have just been pumping and giving him bottles, so hopefully in the next few days he will get the hang of it. Anyway, thats it for now, I am sure there will be more updates soon.- Btw this is the slightly cleaner and less in detail birth story ( I though all the disgusting facts might be too much for the general blog public) If you would like to know more details though you can ask me:)